Hosting Wisdom:

When welcoming Our Guests please remember:

• Guests are going through what may well be the most severe crisis of their lives. Each person deals with this trauma in a different way. Some individuals are very optimistic and open about their situation, while others feel ashamed, humiliated, and alienated.

• Guests have become dependent upon others to support their basic needs and the needs of their children. Many people feel helpless and frustrated by their situation and may express their feelings by withdrawing or acting in an angry manner. Some may find it difficult to accept the goodwill of the host congregation or to show appreciation.

• Guests need their hosts to be sensitive and try to overcome any tendency to judge or criticize and be willing to be effective and helpful listeners. Having an open mind and an ability to see life from another perspective are especially useful attitudes for all volunteers.

• Guests need their hosts to help them focus on their strengths which will help them to create a sense of empowerment. As guests develop this sense, they will be able to use their own internal and external resources to take action and solve problems.

• Relationships with guests should be developed out of mutual respect.

• Guests should be able to view these small spaces as their homes even though they encounter new surroundings and different hosts every week. When hosts enter the Youth House, they are entering the temporary homes of their guests. By viewing their building in this way, hosts can identify more easily with the needs of their guests, and better understand the tremendous stress brought on by homelessness.

• Guests meet dozens of volunteers during the Network stay. Its is important that the hosts take their cues from the guests. Introduce yourself, be friendly, but don’t pry or hover. Those who want to talk are not usually shy. Respect the privacy of those who don’t.

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1. It’s nice to hear your name, so learn the names of our guests too.

2. Labeling people creates invisible barriers. Remember that guests are guests, not the “homeless.” Whether spoken or on a posted sign, labeling creates automatic division, an “us” and “them” syndrome.

3. Personal questions can be tough to answer, so don’t put guests in awkward positions. If they need to talk, give them the chance but don’t pry.

4. Never assume that a guest can’t hear you. Do not discuss guests’ situations with other people. Respect their privacy.

5. Everyone can use a little privacy. Our churches and synagogues become temporary homes for our guests. Always knock before entering a guest’s room.

6. Sometimes we need to spend time alone. Respect guests’ needs for quiet time, by themselves or with family.

7. We all have bad days. Depression, sadness, and hopelessness may come. Allow guests space to deal with their emotions. And be prepared to forgive outbursts, without judging them as ungrateful.
   We understand and care for our children. Allow guests to do the same. Avoid contradicting a guest’s instructions to his/her children. And always ask parents’ permission before giving things to children.

8. Parents need a break. Offer to baby-sit, tutor, play with, and plan activities for interested children while their parents take a break.

9. Adult guests should be treated like adults. Although our guests are in a situation that may require them to be temporarily dependent on others, it does not mean that they are not grown up and able to make their own decisions.

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Guest Guidelines List

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